Kelly Rutherford became a familiar face on television when she appeared as Lily van der Woodsen on Gossip Girl and Megan Lewis on Melrose Place. But on top of those star turns, she is also a mother of two, a style icon and creator of the new Rose Première Perfume. She says creating this new fragrance was something of a family affair. “My kids helped me pick the color. I was deciding between two. My son said: ‘I’d wear this,’” shares Kelly.
Recently, the actress shared with Demetra Ganias on MomCast how she stays elegant, effortless, and grounded—even through life’s hard seasons. Below is an excerpt; for the full conversation, download MomCast today.
Rose Premier—how did it come to be?
I always said I’d love to do something with rose because I love the smell of roses, so we went to Grasse, and we picked the roses. They’re called the roses of May because that’s when they bloom. We did the whole process of making the perfume, all the different things you smell, and this is what we ended up with.
Who has inspired your sense of style?
I think of my grandmother a lot because she had great style. She was very classic and elegant and effortless but still kind of earthy about everything. My mom was a model when I was growing up. They had a good sense that it was respectful to dress nicely—it wasn’t about fashion per se but more about just showing up that way. And I loved magazines growing up. I used to buy House & Garden and make collages on my walls and create these worlds for myself.
How do you practice self-care, both physically and mentally?
Being organized. I know that is not necessarily a beauty tip or anything, but I really love being efficient and organized—it never gets done, but at least it’s ongoing. And living the life you want to live. Getting up every day and saying: “I am choosing this.”
You mention the word ‘choosing,’ and that makes me think of boundaries—how do you go about setting boundaries?
It’s more about listening to that first impulse about something—that first intuitive feeling—instead of talking myself into it. I have a tendency to go, okay, this doesn’t feel right, but then I talk myself into it anyway. I actually talk to my kids, and they talk me through it. I’ll ask them, should I feel guilty about this? I’m really engaged with them about my own boundaries. I want them to feel confident enough to create a boundary with me too.
Affirmations also really help… Instead of saying I’m so worried, speak to them in positive affirmations. Say, you’re really responsible, and I admire that about you. I know you make really good decisions and I appreciate that as a mom. There’s a way to turn our fears into something that becomes their affirmation about themselves.
Have you seen manifestations play out in your life?
We are manifesting all day long. We get up, we think about coffee, and we get our coffee. We just manifested a coffee, but we don’t think about it like that. All day long we are manifesting. It’s just thoughts becoming action, and then becoming reality. Some things take longer because they’re a heavier lift than getting a cup of coffee. But it’s really our natural way of life. We’re just taught the limits. If you take the limits away, things come way quicker. That’s the real practice.
Can you leave us with an affirmation you find particularly powerful?
‘All is well in my world’ is a beautiful one. When you have little kids, you might not have time to meditate and write. And that’s the joy of it, you’re in the moment. Isn’t that what we’re supposed to be doing? Being in the moment, being with our children. There is such a joy in the flow of being a mom and being busy and running around and all of it.
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